


hey there delilah, it's me

by jorellep



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: F/F, I love you guys, btw im new to writing labyu, pls don't hate me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-17
Updated: 2020-03-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:13:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23184571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jorellep/pseuds/jorellep
Summary: when we all fall in love, where do we go?
Relationships: Trixie Mattel/Katya Zamolodchikova
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	hey there delilah, it's me

She felt tears in her eyes, It was only right for her to,

Someone was holding her up, she didn't care who it was, nor did she care at all

She saw her wife, being lowered six feet underground,

never seeing her smile once more, not even beside her when she wakes up every morning

_ *35 years earlier* _

_ "Hey, I think I love you" _

_ "Me too"  _

_ "You love you too?" she said with a laugh and a smile _

_ "No, well, I love me but I love you more." _

_ "Really?" _

_ "Really." _

_ *3 days earlier* _

_ “ Did you know I love you?” _

_ “Yes, I do. I love you too” _

_ *now* _

She climbed the steps to their house, feeling the waves of nostalgia hitting her

Her children guiding her, nearly bearing her weight.

“It’s okay Mama, shes in a better place now”

She sits on the patio, the seat that she once took all those years ago

A tear makes its way down her cheek when she looks over their garden, caressing the pink and red pillow their daughter sewed together when she was 8, it was a representation of her and her wife, a smile spreads across her face. 

If she concentrates hard enough, she can see her wife, cradling their daughter to sleep, she misses her dearly. 

She makes her way into their house, missing the beige envelope sitting neatly on the coffee table. Slowly, she makes her way down the hallway where their bedroom was, slowly opening the door, afraid that she might collapse if she opened the door quickly. 

She lies down on their bed, not bothering to take off her clothes, sleeping off her sadness, her exhaustion, her dread that she won’t see her wife’s face when she wakes up.

Hours later, she wakes up, her hand looking around for her wife’s body, her eyes screwed shut, not wanting to open them for the fear of not seeing her wife there beside her. She opens them anyway, already feeling the disappointment in her heart.

She decides another few hours later that lying on the bed with no intentions of going to sleep was a bad idea, that without her wife’s voice in her head telling her to make a cup of tea, she’d die there without hesitation. She takes off her black dress, replacing it with a silk nightgown and made her way back to the kitchen, still missing the envelope on the coffee table, that is until she sits down with a steaming cup, ready to watch her wife’s unfinished tv shows. 

She sets down her cup, placing a coaster underneath her cup after years of petty arguing of whether or not a coaster did serve benefits, she lost that argument. Her wife was always right, even when times were confusing, she’d still find that her wife was right.

She grabs the envelope and opens it and finds a recorder and a letter for her, the back was signed  _ “to my dear loving wife”.  _ She opens the letter, nearly crying at the sight of her wife’s handwriting.

She reads carefully,

_ “To my wife, _

_ I’m gonna be marrying you tomorrow! Well when I’m writing this, I’m gonna be marrying you tomorrow. If you’re reading this then I guess I’m gone, anyway, on a lighter note, know that I love you, and even when I’m not there, I’ll always try and find myself singing to you when you sleep. Don’t forget to feed the cats! I love you, I don’t think I’m gonna regret anything if I’m with you, I guess I’m gonna regret the fact that you’re burying me or that I didn’t get to spend more time with you. I wish we realised sooner that we were in love, instead of ridiculing ourselves that we weren’t in the first place. ANYWAY, I love you so much. Listen to the recording babe. I love you, never forget that.  _

_ From, your wife (future for me) I love you” _

She smiled at the thought of her wife writing this before their wedding day, sitting in her robe and peering over the sunrise. 

She presses play on the recording before she does anything else,

She cries.

_ “Alright so, I’m gonna try this but I don’t know if it’s going to work” _

It was her wife’s voice

_ “Hit it” _

A tune had started playing, it was the song for their first dance, more tears had fallen since. 

_ “ _ _ Hey there, Delilah _

_ What's it like in New York City? _

_ I'm a thousand miles away _

_ But, girl, tonight you look so pretty _

_ Yes, you do _

_ Times Square can't shine as bright as you _

_ I swear, it's true”  _

It was her voice, the voice that she thought she would no longer hear for the rest of her life, a voice that she longed for. It was her, it was her wife.

_ “ _ _ Hey there, Delilah _

_ Don't you worry about the distance _

_ I'm right there if you get lonely _

_ Give this song another listen _

_ Close your eyes _

_ Listen to my voice, it's my disguise _

_ I'm by your side” _

She was grateful, grateful for the years that they spent together, grateful that she had decided to spend that with her, putting up with all her shit and bearing the weight of being with her. She was grateful for the years of love that poured from her. She loves her so much, so so much. 

The rest of the song played, it was them, the song was them and how much they loved each other. The song was of her and her wife, missing each other, then maybe as it says, they’ll see each other two years, or maybe less or more, she didn’t mind, because she knew, she knew that they’ll meet again even if it took some time. She’ll see her wife again, she didn’t mind waiting a bit more because she was there, right by her side, and she didn’t even need to close her eyes. 

She realised that even without her wife, their house was inviting because she had been there, her wife is her home. She smiled at the thought and dedication that her wife had given after all those years, she didn’t remember the bad stuff, she remembered the good things, the laughter that once filled their house, the children running around. She missed her dearly, yes, but she had no doubt that she was right there with her. Never leaving her side.

She spoke for the first time since the funeral, words that she will never get tired of uttering, even to herself or no one at all,

_ “Thank you, my love, I love you too.”  _

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! It's my first like story that's non-fiction! Constructive criticism is much appreciated! I love these two characters so if I could write them in a much better way, they'd be appreciated by everyone else too! Thanks for reading! 
> 
> Much love,  
> Jo
> 
> P.s! Comment down below on who you think the "wife" is and the main character! Katya or Trixie?


End file.
